Life is a whole mesh of choices. Each individual has a choice every day. Choices determine how we think, feel, act and respond. You have a choice.
The choices I made in the past were all based on my emotions. I think this is the same for everyone. When we feel something, whether that be sad or happy, angry or jealous, we decide in those moments. This can be one of the worse times to make a big decision. We choose to feel those emotions and there is nothing wrong with that. We all need to feel and allow these emotions to rise, but if we choose to react without thinking things through, this is where we can drive our life into pain and suffering.
I remember being in a place of reaction. I would respond to people by how they treated me and the emotions that it brought up in me. I pushed people away when they pushed me. I allowed myself to believe the false pretenses of my emotions. These emotions had been inside me for such a long time, that what I was reacting to, wasn't what was happening in that moment, but what had happened in the past.
By realising where these emotions were coming from and letting it all go, I was able to start to take a step back and react to what was happening in front of me instead of a past situation that may have been similar. I'm now much more open to waiting for a moment and thinking things through before making a choice.
We can have control over our emotions if we choose to. Everyone has the power to face the past and heal the wounds that are driving our emotions and choices. Just being aware and getting to know who we are is so refreshing and freeing.
You have the choice to live the life you're living. I have the choice to live my life the way I am. If you don't like your life then change it. You have the choice to not live that life anymore. If there is a situation that you can't just cut out of your life, then make a choice to look at it differently and appreciate all that it is teaching you. That is when you'll find peace.
Love Rachel x